My First Pair of Underpants
Mr. Doley felt that he had earned the right to be happy about his underwear just like he had earned the right to love every part of his body, the house he lived in, everything about his life. But first the underwear—the story of the underwear goes back to when he was thirteen years old. He had his first pair of underpants when he was thirteen. At that age he had developed a love for movies and novels. To satisfy his love for movies and novels he went to great lengths. Novels he begged and borrowed from his friend Pulova who came from a good family. Pulova’s father bought his son stacks of comics and novels. Movies, he saw in bits and parts in P.P’s house. P.P was a boy in the neighborhood whose house was a ten minute walk from the then teenager Mr. Doley. He had a desktop—it was not his actually, it was his elder sister’s. The government distributed desktop computers to students who scored First Division in their matriculation. It did not matter if the student did not know what a computer mouse was or whether there was electricity in the house to run the computer or not. Mr. Doley’s neighborhood had electricity to run a computer and one could say was highly advanced in matters of technology compared to the other villages. Creating folders, minimizing, maximizing, clicking on the cross sign to close a window, copying and pasting of pictures, videos, movies, burning items into a CD or DVD, installing of applications, video games. The kids there could do it all.
One day while making the rounds in the neighborhood, at P.P’s, the teenage Mr. Gulab chanced upon the “X-Men The Last Stand” movie. He caught a glimpse of a steamy scene between Wolverine and Jean Grey. He desperately wanted to watch a little more of the movie but could not because his long pant was torn throughout the place where the prick hung. A few seconds more of it and he would not be able to stay put nor be able to return home for a long time. During such moments of erection it was as good as impossible to act calm and blend in with the surrounding. Such painful, throbbing erection that it took at least an hour to go down. So he told P.P that he would return after sometime and awkwardly ran out.
Back at home in a zippy, he searched for something not torn in the bottom to wear. He had no pants nor long-pants except the one he was wearing, and it was torn. (No one cared about clothing in his family). The only proper long-pant was not in the house. His elder brother had gone out wearing it, surely. He searched everywhere in the house and luckily found an underwear beneath the bed where spiders made their cobwebs. It was his one underwear and he knew it was dirty in all the senses the word dirty could imply. But the Wolverine and Jean Grey scene kept hovering on his mind and that piece of clothing would do the job. He fished out the underwear with a stick from beneath the bed and smelled it and beat the dust and cobwebs off it. And wore it before he put on his torn long pant. It was kind of warm down there. He was back in P.P’s room within half-an-hour. The movie was put on from the beginning. Yet he could not enjoy it properly—there was an itch down there, and a tickling disturbance. Such self-restraining, indecisive, itchy, painful moments perhaps is the result of a lifetime of karma in earlier lives. Such intensity and immensity and urgency inside one single, helpless, thirteen year old teenager! It was a matter of the dick and the urge to safeguard it for future purpose was what that won through at the end. Every second counted now, a second’s delay in washing the testicles might prove fatal. Run home strip off the clothing and if there was soap in the house then with soap wash the testicles. Fast.
Home! Home! Home!
Back at home he tore off his long-pant and the underwear. Out emerged a spider from his hanging-balls. He had no time for horror. He jumped down to the tube-well and pumped out water over his cock and testicles. And rubbed soap vigorously. PHEW! I think my property would survive. I acted quick.
Now Mr. Doley was grown up and different. The world was different.And he had three pair of underpants now, (he dreamed of having one for each day of the week one day). Euro. Jockey. Woolworth. Hanes. Calvin Klein. Levi’s. Gotham.
Jockey. Such lovely, neat, fitting underpants. Such adorable underpants! He had earned the comfort in his privates. A prisoner can understand the value of freedom, a poor-man can understand the value of a satisfactory meal, Mr. Doley could understand the luxury of having three pair of underpants of his own.