Grandpa, I don't want to be a Sad and Frustrated piece of fuck.
My grandpa’s name was Aoona Doley. I cannot say if he ever put a Mr. in front of his name or whether he could speak an English sentence correctly. I never saw him in fact, he left here before I was born. I know what I know about him thorugh stories I heard from my parents and people whom I did not know but who knew him; I have heard good things about him spoken affectionately, no bad things about him crossed my ears yet. The main thing today that has impelled me to offer my first sentence to him is his wife. My grandmother whom I never saw or met. He died before I was born like my Grandpa. Her name was Kusoi. An ugly name if you hear it for the first time because it’s an uncommon name, but if I scrutinize the sound and combination of the letters I am pulled into an exotic quality and ultimately by its beauty. It has a ring of Japanese to it: Kawasaki, Kusoi. My grandpa and grandma had a love marriage and they were married till the end. When my grandpa left here my grandma followed too. In my own case, I, their grandson whom they never saw is utterly frustrated in search for a lover. I am the last person to a list of girls whom I have talked to, texted, met and most of whom I consider as friends.
Dear Grandpa and Grandma, they find me odd, and unfit for a relationship. I am becoming an expert in taking silence from the other end of the line. I have become an expert in waiting for text replies that come if they come as a pittance. I do not know if I ever wanted to end up this way. Frustrated and failing to find any love from someone from the opposite sex. I do not want to die alone, old and bitter. Sorry for the last two lines.
That’s why this grandson whom you never cradled in your arms wants you to know that he loves the two of you. You two found each other. I will perhaps go to and fro from here to there and leave here without having found a partner. Well 'so what' I say, my grandpa had found my grandma.
I have neither your nose nor your face, none of any of you two’s. I am the odd one who resembles my mother completely and so has no resemblance of you two. But I have not the slightest doubt that you two would have loved me just as any other ordinary grandparents love their grandson. I might even have had a special spot in your heart.
But fuck that! I want to get angry for the moment. I am fed up of not getting any replies from girls who happily give me their numbers in a mutual moment of tenderness and feeling. Fuck it you two. You two wait for me wherever you are, let’s meet one day. Don’t disappoint me like the girl’s here. Don’t make me a sad and frustrated piece of fuck.